Undersea garden

I have decided I like myself. I really, really, like me and to show it, have decided to get a tattoo.

I have a tattoo already. A small green gecko on my left leg that I got in Hawaii a few years ago. No one really sees it unless I wear shorts and flip-flops. Even socks cover it up. I thought I was pretty daring just to get that.

Now I am entering a different phase of my life. I am all for everyone being whom they want to be. Embrace whatever your heart desires, within reason of course. I did the whole being married and having the kid scenario. I behaved. I drove car pools. I baked cupcakes and ran the Halloween carnival. I attended work dinners and events, to carry on conversations with people I didn't like or have one thing in common with. I chit-chatted with neighbors and maintained a nicely kept home. I did the birthday parties and Christmas gathering. I have fixed Thanksgiving Day dinners time and time again and put together giant family events. I have done what is expected of me.

I want something different. Something edgy. Something that people will not expect. So I am doing an entire arm tattoo. Maybe. I have just started and we will see how the pain goes. So far, so good.

I came up with the idea. I thought about it and researched it. I don't believe the kid was a big fan but he faithfully supported me. The first appointment came and went, I cancelled it. The next came. I went.

I absolutely loved it! Tattooing isn't for everyone. For me, it is something I totally love. It has only just begun and already I feel different. I can cover it all up. No one knows it is there but me. And it effects me. I feel bolder and brave. That the image I present to the world, is but one side of me. And I can choose to show it to you or not. My choice. I haven't showed anyone yet. Except the kid.

The kid, who REALLY loves it. Stares at it all the time and exclaims how cool it is. Right now it is only the outline and shading. In two weeks the color will go on. I have no idea what color it will be, so that is why the delay. A giant octopus resides at the top of my arm. A beautiful octopus. My favorite creature of the sea.

A creature that is smarter than it appears. Is gentler than is given credit for. And totally 100% beautiful, in a weird and unusual way.

Just like me. How appropriate it lives on my arm.